A picture must be wild

Messy, raw, far from perfectly composed, honest. I can see stages and know that it takes me far too long to finish it. What am I doing it for??? This is a picture, not a frigging cloying candy box for an auntie!!!

The picture will leak its strength if tampered with for too long. Look, these are the pictures that I have lost, pampered them to death. Oh, if there could be two in one, but no, there is only one road: paint, paint, more.